to the plagiarist in my summer class

Dear Plagiarist,

Here are some of the many reasons I hate plagiarism and those who practice it.
  1. You have now wrecked any chance you had of getting fair and even treatment from me. Even if you apologize and fulfill the sanctions recommended by my institution (which in this case probably will not include failing the class, since you are apparently a first-time offender) I will never be able to read your work without suspicion. In fact, I can't even look at you right now without feeling a wave of hostility.
  2. You have destroyed the atmosphere of trust and intellectual inquiry that I've been creating for this course during the term. Your actions make me feel more suspicious towards my other students as well, not just you.
  3. Based on your other written work, which I went back and double-checked today, you are certainly smart enough to have written your own midterm. The other students wrote perfectly decent exams on their own power. If I thought you were simply stupid, or simply malevolent, it would be a sad case. But since I don't think you are either of those things, your case is both sad and irritating. Are you just lazy?
  4. Do you really think I'm that stupid as to never have read the Spark Notes? I knew your stuff was cribbed from the first paragraph. But in the time it took you to carefully substitute synonyms for every fourth word could easily have been spent writing your own damn sentences.
  5. By the way, I grade exams pretty easy. Most people made at least a B- on the midterm. You probably would have too, if you had done your own work.
  6. You ruined my day. I hate you.

Your Professor who's been working really hard and not sleeping enough in order to prepare and teach a decent class for you irresponsible unappreciative slacker.