6/07/2005

simile

The best explanation for how I'm feeling right now about this move is that it's sort of like when you have a bad cold that includes sinus and nasal congestion. So bad that you can barely breathe, can't sleep lying down, etc. At such times (which thankfully happen to me very rarely) I get to a point when I can barely remember what it was like to breathe regularly and freely. When I'm resentful of all those other people running around with clear nostrils. When I swear up and down that I will remember this feeling of congestion and never again take breathing for granted.

Yeah, it's something like that. I'm really, really, really looking forward to the time when I will be able to just come home from the office and cook dinner and relax and take a shower and do all the ordinary boring stuff of regular life -- and not have to think about any of it. We are maybe one-third unpacked & settled in at this point -- enough to survive, but the end doesn't seem near either. There's still a lot of decisions to be made about where stuff should go. (The kitchen and bathroom in particular are completely differently configured in this house as compared with our last one.) And even for the things we have put away, it's not yet familiar to us. So every single thing I do, even making breakfast or taking a shower, requires a lot more thought and effort than it will in a month or two from now. At which point amnesia will start to settle in and I will forget the agony of this month. But for right now? I can't help but look at people in the grocery store and think how easy they have it, just stopping in for some food to fix for dinner. Someday I too will be so carefree.